Rodney Dangerfield on Naming a Dog
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“ Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid. “ |
Rodney Dangerfield on Drinking
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“ I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. “ |
Rodney Dangerfield on Growing Up
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“ I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. “ |
Steven Wright on the Nobel Prize
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“ I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. “ |
Lao Tzu on Travel
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“ A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving. “ |
Lao Tzu on Travel
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“ A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. “ |
Robert Louis Stevenson on Travel
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“ For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move. “ |
Robert Louis Stevenson on Travel
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“ There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign. “ |
Warren Buffett on Trust
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“ Never trust a geek with a calculator. “ |
Mitch Hedberg on Fake Plants
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“ My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. “ |